Sunday 31 March 2019

Mental Health and Education: BELIEVE ME, you're not alone.


TRIGGER WARNING: mental illness, anxiety, depression, alcohol


On the 17th March 2019, I popped up a post on my instagram story basically saying "I'm writing a blog on mental health in the education system, let me know if you have anything to say", from this I had dozens of replies from friends, family and people who just wanted to share their story. Honestly, I was taken back by everyone's input and I really want to do everything you guys have said to me in confidence justice.




Anyone who has ever met me, or has been to this blog before knows my story, so I'll keep this as short and sweet as possible. Set the scene, you've spent the entirety of your earlier terms of your A2 year putting together your UCAS application for a degree, then waiting on responses and ultimately waiting on results. You study DAMN HARD and hope for the best, only to then decide less than a week before results day that the academic life isn't for you and you want to be more creative... Maybe study a language, or an art... Maybe JAPANESE. Yep, this idiot made a very last minute change from a politics degree, to Japanese. The lovely guy on the phone explained it was a complete beginners course and you didn't need any prior knowledge and that my expected grades were more than enough. Sure enough, results day rolled around and I had success, gaining myself a place at the University of Sheffield to do Japanese Studies. Honestly, I was excited.
For a number of reasons, my mental health whilst I was in Sheffield was quite possibly the worst it's ever been, yet I did nothing about it. The summer before I had began to spiral but hoped that going to university would somehow miraculously fix this issue. I drank a bottle of wine like it was a meal, either didn't leave bed or didn't go to bed at all. If I wasn't drunk or asleep I was likely to be crying. The worst part was that ultimately, I didn't say a thing until deciding to drop out.
Image may contain: 3 people, including Adam Thornton and Chloe Birmingham, people smiling, indoorThe next year was tough but I went back to University the following academic term at the University of Chester. Politics and History this time (Japanese wasn't for me, shock). My mental illnesses didn't go away, I wish. But I once again learnt what they were to me, and how I could help myself live happily with them. My anxiety became something that made me actively make friends, I joined debate society and fell in love with those losers. They make up most of my good memories, and I knew that even with y anxiety, I was safe around them. Two years later I stood in front of a room of those people and made an speech, that day I was elected President of the society.

This is not to say I'm free from my troubles. But it does get easier, I learnt to know and love myself a little better. I visited wellbeing teams when lectures became overwhelming and I have counselling for when my thoughts are stronger than my motivation. I became proactive about my mental health. It took time, but university and education can be hard at the best of times. Sometimes I forget to wash my hair, never mind listening to a self care podcast. But little by little you can piece together what works for you.

It was astounding to hear how many of stories sounded so similar to mine. Especially the fact we all felt so alone in them. There was something so concerning about how much pressure was put on young people going into university or college. So many people mentioned the aspect of just "hoping it'd fix itself" before they rocked up on campus. Wishing for the experience that they saw in films and tv shows, when in reality things don't always work out that way. Long hours in your room with your own thoughts is hard. The reality for some looks so much more like "mostly surviving on ramen - noodles literally cooked from the hot water tap in my room because I didn't want to be around my flat mates.". Admitting to yourself that you’re not having a good time is hard enough, let alone to your tutors, doctors or parents who call once a week to hear all the amazing memories you’re supposed to be making But the hardest part is moving past the idea that this wasn't going to be the mind blowing, crazy experience you expected it to be. No matter how drunk you are.

This broke my heart, so so many of the messages I received talked about turning to alcohol to handle their issues. I know it's the first thing I did, and I see it in so many others, even now. It's something that once you start you can't stop, a friend of mine explained that a combination of overwhelming academic pressure and social stress meant that he "started drinking every night because it made [him] feel alright, now 4 years deep and [he] still drinks most nights to cope". I didn't even realise I was doing it myself until I was on facetime to my friends back home and one of them pointed out I had finished a bottle of wine on my own whilst chatting, on a Tuesday evening. From heavy nights out to study sessions with pals and a bottle of wine and possibly the main good memories we have from university could be drunk ones... it’s easy to cling to that. But one drink with friends easily turns to a bottle alone and that makes it so much harder to go without. It’s scary, but it’s something you can come back from.

I don’t want to make this a horror story about mental illness in students. Because whilst it is happening, the most worrying thing to me is how alone people feel in their stories. When almost everyone I know will know someone else who has a story like mine. University can be exhausting and challenging, socially, physically and mentally. But it doesn’t have to be something you deal with alone. Recently enough, I held a talk with my Labour Student Society at the University of Chester on mental health on campus, I can’t tell you how much that session opened my eyes to what a simple conversation can do. We sat there for the best part of two hours as likeminded people who saw the benefit of sharing, with that we realised that what we are going through doesn’t have to be a shameful thing, but simply another thing in your life that you will work to overcome. I left that talk surprisingly chipper and I’ve been wanting to write this blog ever since. It encouraged me to have these conversations as often as appropriate, and they’ve been received with open arms by most.

So whilst yes, the stories of neglectful departments who are unsupportive of you in you times of need and doctors who just don’t seem to get it are more than true and unfortunately very possible, there is always going to be someone there for you that will take that first step with you. Whilst you may feel failed in your first few attempts, I beg of you to keep trying and in some cases not take no as an answer. You deserve to be listened to, you deserve better. Be proactive, there are organisations on almost all university campuses or that are active in the area that will be there for you. Whilst they might be under staffed with long waitlist (which absolutely needs to change with help), you are still a priority to them.

So look out for each other. Trust and love yourself and don’t forget that you’re absolutely not alone.

Much love,
Chloe x




Anxiety UK

Charity providing support if you've been diagnosed with an anxiety condition.
Phone: 03444 775 774 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 5.30pm)

Bipolar UK

A charity helping people living with manic depression or bipolar disorder.

CALM

CALM is the Campaign Against Living Miserably, for men aged 15 to 35.
Phone: 0800 58 58 58 (daily, 5pm to midnight)

Men's Health Forum

24/7 stress support for men by text, chat and email.

Mental Health Foundation

Provides information and support for anyone with mental health problems or learning disabilities.

Mind

Promotes the views and needs of people with mental health problems.
Phone: 0300 123 3393 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 6pm)
Website: www.mind.org.uk

No Panic

Voluntary charity offering support for sufferers of panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Offers a course to help overcome your phobia/OCD. Includes a helpline.
Phone: 0844 967 4848 (daily, 10am to 10pm)

OCD Action

Support for people with OCD. Includes information on treatment and online resources.
Phone: 0845 390 6232 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 5pm)

OCD UK

A charity run by people with OCD, for people with OCD. Includes facts, news and treatments.
Phone: 0845 120 3778 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 5pm)
Website: www.ocduk.org  

PAPYRUS

Young suicide prevention society.
Phone: HOPElineUK 0800 068 4141 (Mon to Fri,10am to 5pm & 7 to 10pm. Weekends 2 to 5pm)

Rethink Mental Illness

Support and advice for people living with mental illness.
Phone: 0300 5000 927 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 4pm)
Website: www.rethink.org

Samaritans

Confidential support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair.
Phone: 116 123 (free 24-hour helpline)

SANE

Emotional support, information and guidance for people affected by mental illness, their families and carers. 
SANEline: 0300 304 7000 (daily, 4.30 to 10.30pm)
Textcare: comfort and care via text message, sent when the person needs it most: http://www.sane.org.uk/textcare
Peer support forum: www.sane.org.uk/supportforum

YoungMinds

Information on child and adolescent mental health. Services for parents and professionals.
Phone: Parents' helpline 0808 802 5544 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 4pm)

Abuse (child, sexual, domestic violence)

NSPCC

Children's charity dedicated to ending child abuse and child cruelty. 
Phone: 0800 1111 for Childline for children (24-hour helpline)
0808 800 5000 for adults concerned about a child (24-hour helpline)
Website: www.nspcc.org.uk

Refuge

Advice on dealing with domestic violence.
Phone: 0808 2000 247 (24-hour helpline)

Addiction (drugs, alcohol, gambling)

Alcoholics Anonymous

Phone: 0845 769 7555 (24-hour helpline)

Gamblers Anonymous

Narcotics Anonymous

Phone: 0300 999 1212 (daily 10am to midnight)
Website: www.ukna.org

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