Christmas Shopping: the dos, don'ts and I'M BEGGING YOU NOT TOs

Halloween is done and over, it's freaking chilly outside and I've already picked out our tree. In my eyes it's officially Christmas and I don't care what people say. So Merry Christmas and let's get this festive shit show on the road. 

As a very extra Christmas fanatic I tend to get Christmas shopping done early. With good reason, a student budget and more wonderful people to shop for every year, I know how painful running out of money becomes. I spread my Christmas shopping out usually between three paydays, leaving money for actually existing as well as making sure I give myself time to think about what to buy for certain people. Here's a list of my super easy, but ridiculously organised Christmas plans:

DO's:

• SECRET SANTA: Every year my pals from home and I do this now, it just makes sense! It's a fun and cheap way to make sure everyone gets something worthwhile whilst everyone is a little tight on money. If you're at university, flat secret santa can be a great way of getting to know people better and makes for so much fun guessing who bought what. I usually tend to get it sorted who's got who in SEPTEMBER, just so we can all be planned well in advance. 

• DO THE SILLY FAMILY TRADITIONS: don't be that person, you don't have to cool around the people that literally wiped your butt for years. Put on the ugly slippers and have fun!

• CHRISTMAS WITH PALS: If you do have secret santa, plan a day together to give each other presents. All cram into someones bedroom or living room, stick on a festive album or film and just have a cute little day with some of your favourite people. Trust me it's the best! I've done it every year since high school, and even with my uni pals last year, which led to one of my favourite memories from my time at Sheffield.

• DECORATE WITH RECKLESS ABANDON: when I decorate for Christmas, it looks like a 10 year old has been let loose in a craft shop (see pictures for proof). It's go hard or go home, there is no "pretty" in how I decorate. Have FUN, it's Christmas.
• CHRISTMAS LIGHTS/MARKETS: yes they are crowded and overpriced but you can't put a price on the giggles and memories you make at times like this, it's fun and who doesn't love getting wrapped up warm, cuddling people they love in festive spirit?
  
• COMMUNICATE WITH PEOPLE: Not sure if you need to buy for someone, ask? Especially if you're strapped for cash as a student or as a parent, the likelihood is, so are they! It can be awkward to send that first message but you can save yourself a lot of stress for the sake of one or two "hey are we doing Christmas gifts this year?" messages.
  
• START EARLY: Like I said earlier, start shopping earlier rather than later. As a retail worker who has seen a few Christmas rushes, I know that panicked last minute shopper and there is nothing worse than that "out of stock" disappointment, not to mention the sky rocketing prices of things and the horrible busy, cranky atmosphere. Doing your shopping this way makes sure you can enjoy the Christmas spirit and not feel so poor in the lead up. 
• BUDGET: Once you've sorted who you're buying for, make a list and think about what you have to spend. Dedicate a rough amount to each person and keep that in mind when shopping. Shop around, you live in the age of the internet! Find the best price, ain't no shame in a bargain if it makes for the right gift.  
• LET YOUR LOVED ONES KNOW THEY'RE LOVED: Heck give everyone who needs and deserves it some love, Christmas isn't all about presents and food. It's a gorgeous time of year where you finally get to spend a tiny bit of quality time with people, away from their busy schedules. Appreciate it and use it wisely!
• 

DON'T:

• BUY MORE THAN YOU NEED: most Christmas shoppers have been prone to the Debenhams or Boots "just in case" gift box. WHY DO WE DO IT? It's a waste of money and if you're well organised and sensible about who you need to buy for it's just not necessary. You'll end up with a £15 Soap and Glory gift set that sits unopened in your room until near the next Christmas when you run out of shower gel and end up hoarding foot cream or body lotion from the phantom gifts of years gone by, like you're ever gonna use it.
• LEAVE IT TO THE LAST MINUTE: if you shop on Christmas eve, you make me nervous. I just don't get it! Stock has gone and people are MISERABLE. I've seen people sliding under closing shutters, begging for something that the shop hasn't seen in days because they've all been snatched up. Don't do this to yourself.
• LEAVE YOURSELF SHORT: I know a lot is expected of you to give good gifts at Christmas, but don't suffer because of it. Everyone's pockets feel that bit emptier but talk to family and friends and just be sensible about your spending, people get that you won't always have all the money in the world. Gifts can be cheap and beautiful, it really can be about the thought that's gone into it above all else.
• BE LAZY: on the issue of thought, if you're gonna do Christmas presents, don't be a cop out. If you're stuck, don't be afraid to ask them if there is something they want/need (or ask people around them if they're your SS). Don't just give up and get gift cards or 'smelly' bits, especially not for secret santa, there is nothing more exciting than knowing a gift has been pick FOR you. 
• LET SHOPPING RUIN THE SPIRIT: shopping sucks, if you're not good at it, stick to online. In this day and age you can do all of your shopping without getting out of bed if you really want to, and then just go out and enjoy Christmas spirit through the lights and markets. 

I'M BEGGING YOU NOT TO:

• BE RUDE TO RETAIL STAFF: I cannot express this enough. No matter how stressed you get, how many things have gone wrong in your day, no matter what happens. DO NOT BE RUDE TO STAFF, 9/10 they have not done anything wrong and almost everything that has happened that hasn't gone your way is out of their hands. They are probably on minimum wage, possibly even temps who thanks to company policy can do nothing else to help you. They are tired and stressed and want to go home and be with their family too. Just don't be a dick, please. 
• DAMPEN PEOPLE'S CHRISTMAS SPIRIT: if people want to get all Frosty the Snowman and enjoy Christmas, throwing their decorations up and have them so extra that you can see them from space, let them. It really doesn't affect you, they're having fun.
• BE RUDE ABOUT A GIFT: If someone has bought you something, they have spent their hard earned money on you in a time where they've got A LOT to do, they are very poor and probably sacrificed a lot to do so. Don't get all "but it's not a ____" or "this person got ____". Presents are not a relative issue, you should be incredibly grateful for anything at all, seem it! 

Well that's it! I hope your Christmas period is well underway and I hope that you're as excited as I am. I wish you the best of luck in you're shopping adventures and hope that you have a incredible Christmas. 

Much love,

- Chloe x

Dare To Dream

During the last twelve month the phrase "so what's the plan?" was completely banned in my house. Nobody except me was allowed to even whisper the idea and if they did it led to a heated debate and me sobbing my heart out.

I didn't know where I was in life or what to do next. Every opportunity I was blessed with led to me being told that I was either over or under qualified and I was sad and defeated. Most nights I searched the internet for jobs that didn't require a degree but were interesting, not to much success, and spent most days feeling worn down by it. I saw careers officers and college lecturers, most of whom made me cry, nothing seemed to fit. Most people just expected me to just go to university, not realising how scary that idea had become to me.

It took a really bad memory and a short stint in the worst job I've ever had to kick some motivation into me. In the space of three weeks I'd grovelled for my old (amazing) job back, I'd applied for a new university and started my course there. I stopped being scared, because I realised it wasn't that hard to allow myself to dare to dream. The process was petrifying and I still had a lot of intrusive, anxious days But for the first time since leaving my first university, I let my dad ask me what my plan was and I gave him an answer. I've began to apply this to more of my everyday life.

Recently I've been listening to a lot of podcasts, they help me sleep and help me relax whilst I study. They're usually completely irrelevant to my life and not often about things I'm planning to become invested in. However, I have thoroughly enjoyed every single one. Being a McFly fan from a young age, I heard about Giovanna Fletcher's (Tom Fletcher's wife) podcast based on her book 'Happy Mum, Happy Baby'. Currently, I am not a mum nor do I have any upcoming plans to be in the near future, however the honesty and lighthearted approach to some often incredibly sensitive issues (note: especially in her podcasts with friend Izzy Judd and husband Tom Fletcher) have really made me stop and think about a few things similar to apply in my life.

After going through awful experiences in life, we can't let ourselves be afraid to try again. We can't shut down and give up. Unfortunately, retiring to your bedroom in you parents house before you turn 20 is not an option. You have to get back up, dust yourself off and give life another go, however you approach it this time around. It might take time, and how long is a matter of the individual, but you can come back from this, whatever it may be.

I have officially decided to start writing a book, following the same lines as my blog and touching on stories like this. Hopefully, in the future I want to use my degree to become a motivational speaker, especially to students who don't feel like they're not heading in the right direction. This is something that January 2017 me would have found laughable, speaking in front of my family about struggles gave me panic attacks, never mind people I'd never met. Nevertheless, this confidence to let myself try and allowing myself to accept that failure isn't the end of the world has gotten me far.

Don't give up on the things you love, be that person that strives for perfection, but don't let yourself forget that failure is not the end. You don't have to be the best, you just have to be the best you can be.

Look after yourself.

Much love,

- Chloe x

Save The Last Dance for YOU

Whether you're at university, working, looking after children or working on your career, days are long and often stressful. Even more so if you're doing more than one at once. I'm a full time student with a part time job, which is unfortunately the reality for most students now because of how expensive it is to fund your further education. Alike most, my loans do not even cover my accommodation, let alone anything else. I don't have a day off and I often work late into the night on one commitment or another. Sometimes, it is easy to forget that the most important thing is taking some time to just... not. To just stop for a while and take a step back and look after myself.

In the past, I'd do this by treating myself to a face mask or going out for dinner. It was something that kept my moral up and let me let go of whatever I had on my mind. However, I have found that this became more of a 'reward', this isn't what I wanted. Making time for yourself shouldn't be something you do because you did other aspects of your life well, but a necessity so that you CAN do other things well. Looking after your physical and mental health is not a treat. You deserve better. Think about that next time you're feeling guilty for not doing something with that spare half an hour you've been blessed with.

I put up Instagram pictures and tweets about this a lot but you DO matter and you I want more people to themselves first when they can. Taking some time for yourself doesn't have to be a big deal, nor does it have to be expensive. At the moment I have been taking an hour in the evening to play a game, read something that has nothing to do with my course or even just lay in bed. I have given myself a more extensive face care routine which I have loved getting doing because it really makes me fell so refreshed and more like I've got my life together. But after going through a very stressful year I feel so much more relaxed and at peace with myself, despite living in very similar conditions.

Above everything else I just want people to understand that you're not meant to have your mind running 24 hours a day, you don't have to work until something is 100% finished every time. Stop for a while (doesn't matter how long, my  main 'stop' was for eight months whilst I rethought university) just let yourself breathe.

TAKE A BREAK. YOU WON'T REGRET IT :)

Much love,

Chloe x